The Resume Man

Dating in South Florida is hard and frustrating and sometimes...well most of the time these days, I am beginning to wonder if it is even worth it.

I meet guys in different places, out when I am on a run, at a race, at the dog park, etc....

Well about two months back I meet this guy at the park. I was running with my dog and we got to chatting when I stopped for water. He seemed normal enough and we chatted for a while. But it was getting hot and although the guy asked me if I wanted to go grab a coffee and keep talking, I wanted to:

A) Get home and give Jake something to eat, water and get him into the AC
B) Get a shower...I am dripping in sweat, its South Florida summer fools...sweat is running down my ass crack
C) What if he is crazy...do I really want to go have coffee with a crazy dude...need to weed out the crazy first

So I say no and I figure the best way to see if anything might spark is to give him my number. I tell him to text me sometime. I figure, we meet at a park so he has to be kinda into active things and maybe we have some stuff in common.

Well before I even get out of the park...guy is texting me. This may seem cute to some girls, but to me...we just spoke. I said text me sometime, not as soon as I drive away. --> FLAG 1

Whatever, I get home and showered, did what I needed to do and by the time I did respond (about 2 hours later), I had 4 or 5  more additional txt from him. He asked me what took so long, and told me that he was wondering what was going on. --> FLAG 2

Over the next week or so we text back and forth. As we get to talking I find out the so-called job he was telling me about was his OLD job and he is currently unemployed and has been for awhile now. OK, not the best, but I understand that the economy is in the crapper and jobs are sometimes hard to come by...but still. --> FLAG 3

Now the more he texts me the more I start to realize that running into him at the park was a fluke and that it was probably the first time he had even been to a park in years. He was there with some friend for a bbq or something. Whatever, I am a pretty active person so obviously I want to date someone who is active as well. When he starts asking me why I go to the gym everyday and telling me the last time he went was over a year ago...I start to wonder...maybe this isn't a good fit. --> FLAG 4

Next he owns a purse dog. I know, I know. men can own small weak yappy purse dogs. Hell Jake's bark is so girly it is embarrassing but he is still a 40lb mutt who is strong a hell and tough as nails! Boy runs 7 miles with me and can drag me down the road no problem. So a man with a dog smaller than my shoe...for me personally it is a turn off. --> FLAG 5

By flag number 5 in as many days...I decide...NOPE, rather not bother going down this road, should just say something before it goes any father.

So I give him a heads up. I tell him...in a nicer way, that  I don't think we would be much of a match considering his favorite pass time is sitting on the couch watching Dorito's, not looking for a new job while watching TV and mine is hitting the gym for a few hours every day and racing on the weekends. He said he still wanted to take me out to dinner and that I should give him a chance. Whatever...his choice, I said my peace.

So anyway....I got really busy with training and didn't respond for about 2 days, when I suddenly got a text saying.

"Hey Chloe Foster how have you been? Nice Facebook Picture, You are as pretty as I remember."

What...ummm...WTF...

I never told him my last name...did he just seriously just looked me up on Facebook --> YES all my privacy setting are up and pretty much you can't see shit unless we are friends...and I only friend people I KNOW, but I think if you are going to stalk someone on facebook (and other social media) you shouldn't tell them about it when you don't really know them yet. Stalk in a sneaky way, don't blare that crap out there.

I told him it was a little creepy and it kinda wigged me out.

He said he wasn't creepy and to prove it to me he proceeded to TEXT me a complete copy of his Resume...

Really...now that just got even creepier. I have never had a guy send me a copy of his Resume to prove to me that he was not creepy. I have never had a guy offer to show me his resume...what the hell does a resume have to do with if you are a creepster or not!? Seriously! Whatever...maybe I am just a complete bitch.

I told him that I would rather we end it and not take things farther....I didn't think we were a match anyway. He asked if we could be friends, and me being the anti-social person that I am passed on that options as well.

He has proceeded to text me at least 2 times a week since then...to this day. Just either with
"Hi" or "Are you still bothered by that" or "Can we be friends yet" or "How are you & Jake doing"

I never respond...don't need to lead him on...and it has been over 2 months.

Oh well, guess that wasn't romance in S. Florida...I am still on the "hunt" for a good many in this backasswards place. Maybe next time...but I I doubt it.