Tonbridge U.K. 5K - AKA The Run of the Ice Age

While on vacation in the UK (attending the Doctor Who 50th Celebration & visiting family), I decided it would be fun to sign up & do a 5K. You know, different weather, different terrain, why not, I can't do all my running on Florida flats forever. Hell our idea of a hill is over a bridge!!

So after some looking around I came across this site, ParkRun.org. They offer weekly FREE 5Ks all over Great Britain! 

*Can I just say, why the hell don't we offer that in the US? Free weekly runs would be awesome!*

I find a local one near my Uncle, I send him a quick email to make sure he'd be available to take me and I sign up...ready for my first run outside the U.S.

We land in England & for a girl who has spent the last 5 years in Florida where it doesn't get below 50 year round I almost died walking off that plane! Now I have lived in upstate NY, the Mountains of VA & the wasteland of STL MO, but being in S. FL has spoiled me!! I remembered in theory what cold was, but my body had forgotten! 

I did try to run almost every day of my trip. I even managed to get a 2 mile run done in the middle of London (Kings Cross) which I'm sure caused a few people to look. But once we got to my families (Burgess Hill) I found a nice 5 like route that even passed by a park so I could do push ups, jumping jacks, Burpees, squats etc. being on vacation is no reason to get lazy.

So race day finally rolled around I was pretty sure I was ready to do this. I didn't expect a PR, but I was confident I would do OK. I'd talked my cousin Kim into doing it with me. One of the real nice things...the race started at 9:30 am, so no 5 am wake up call. But it was cold & wet & muddy!!! And I was decked out in a long sleeve rash guard and long runner compression pants (Skins - love them) and everyone around me was in shorts and shirts. Were they mad? Was I mad? What was going on here, because it was cold...like COLD! I wasn't a complete mad hatter as my cousin also had cold weather running apparel on, but dear god these other people, completely loons if you ask me!

The race started off fine. Only a 5K quick and dirty full on run it out race, but about a mile in this Florida girl started to feel it.

First my noes & fingers went. No worries, you don't need that to run. 

Then my toes stated to numb and the little voice inside my head asking why I was running in sub zero temperatures started to get louder and louder until she was SCREAMING BLOODY MURDER AT ME. By the time I hit the turn to circle back every breath I took racked the back of my throat & in pure agony. I was terrified to spit encase I'd see blood! Yes that's right, I'd convinced myself that the cold air had ripped apart my insides & I swore I could taste the blood trickling down my throat into my esophagus and down to my tummy.

But that wasn't the worst. Besides being 85% sure at least one toe had fallen off  if not two, I could no longer feel my legs. At any moment I was going to topple forward, over roll over, & see my legs burying themselves under some dead leaves for warmth. I kept checking to not only make sure they were still there but also still moving & not just bricks of ice.

WELL YOU BETTER PICK IT UP NOW YOU MORON the voice inside my head kept screaming at me and all I could do was respond with, "I can't pick it up, I only have 9 toes and am losing blood at what I am sure is a very disturbing rate inside my mouth!"

Pushing myself forward I knew I was almost there, and crossing the finish line I wanted to just keep running to a car...with the heat on full blast...and just sit in it, never to emerge again!

But I did well, I actually managed to come in 2nd Female and 1st in my age group. No prizes or medals or anything, but the fact that when I did take off my shoes and check I had all 10 toes was prize enough.

I love the fact that I did a race outside the U.S. and I hope to do many more all over the world, but I will have to remember that not everywhere has weather like we do in South Florida! 

Classic Chloé Moments - Me v/s TV

I seem spend my life on the go go go. I never seem to stop moving, so last night when I finally had a plan free evening to relax w/ Jakearoni & my TV I was stocked! 

Saturday had been a long day for me already, I was up at 6 am for the Fight for Air 5K (which I crushed btw) then it was off to work. Did a little BJJ training, then taught kickboxing, Dim Sum w/ my friend...let's just say I needed a "do nothing" evening.

I got a bottle of mid-grade Pinot Noir (I'm a broke girl), cooked up a delicious chicken dinner & sank into my couch of lost hope. I flipped on the TV & started catching up on my way too full DVR, shows going back 2-3 weeks, it was gonna be a good night. 

But you know me, I can't sit still for too long before the box of Halloween decorations that I pulled out of the closet earlier was starting to stare at me. So after failing to ignore it, I got up and figured I would just set up a few of the decoration around the house...get the season started. 

After about an hour...somehow the decorations led to sweeping and moping the floor, dusting everything in sight and of course cleaning up all the dishes, I was feeling done & grabbed my now second glass of wine and sat back down. 

Suddenly my AT&T remote wasn't working. 

WTF!? Did I somehow un-program it while in my cleaning frenzy? OK, no problem...I go to the remote setup. Manual..input all the codes...volume still not working. Odd. I try the automatic remote setup...volume still not working. Curious. I tried all the codes again...volume still not working. Bizzar. I look at the remote...it's an S4, set up says it is for a S1 thur S3 series, so I Google it...maybe I'm missing something. Nope, S4 series is also like S1-S3. So I try the automatic set up again. Nada. Seriously. I try the codes yet a-fucking-gain...volume still not working. 

By this time, I'm starting to get pissed. Are the batteries dying? Is this new remote ATT sent 2 weeks ago already jacked up (my last one finally died and I had to replace it)? Is my TV evil? Does God hate me!!!???

So I change the batteries...nothing. 
Starting to convince myself that I am just missing something obvious, I grab the TV remote...& this is where things get twisted...the TV remote is also not working. What The Hell Is Going On!!!??? I never use the TV remote...batteries are fresh in BOTH remotes. Yup I am going mad.

Well my night has gone from relaxing to frustrating. I can still stop, pause, fast forward, view recordings, turn the TV on & off...screw it. My second glass of wine quickly turns into a third as I get more and more obsessed with this freaking remote. I can't relax, it is just driving me crazy, why is the volume not working. I worked an hour ago. 

Knowing that I am working myself towards a psychotic break, I force myself to give up. I don't know, maybe it will randomly start working again tomorrow. I find the volume on the actual TV, adjust it & after an HOUR AND HALF of messing with it. I just watch TV. By now it's 10:30 & I'm falling asleep on the couch so I sleep walk myself to bed. Plus, I can't stop thinking about the dame remote!

This morning after my run I sit on the couch to enjoy my tea & watch some news before heading to the gym. 

The volume is STILL NOT WORKING. As I quickly dust around my TV (yes, I like things clean..so what) something hits me...I put a Halloween decoration right in front if the center of the TV. A foam zombie zone sign...could that be blocking the censor? 

Test...yup..facepalm. IDIOT! 

Classic Chloe! 

My Office Workout

I don't know about many of you, but I sit at a desk all day...like ALL DAY log. 9 hours a day and it drives me bonkers.

I use to go to the gym at work during lunch, however since they implemented a policy at our company that after 3 late punch ins (we have to punch in and out on our computers everyday) you are either suspended a day without pay or fired (depending on your boss) I decided not to risk it.

New Young Single Homeowner and all, I would rather not lose a day without pay because I was waiting for someone to get out of the shower after my workout one day. That is just how our company is...so because I can't get a mini workout at the gym during lunch anymore, I had to find a new way to workout, because if I don't at least get some little workout during the day, I will go bat crazy!

So this is what I do, I am not sure what one would call this...so lets just call it a quick desk workout. it is just something that I can do so I don't feel like I am getting fat and help pass the time before I can go workout and train!  :)

Leg Lifts: 
I know it sounds silly, but just kicking back your chair and lifting one leg, fully extending the knee up and down. Do about 20-30 on each side.

Chair Planks:
I sit cross legged at my desk with my feet tucked under me...Indian style, and a lot of times I have to readjust one leg or another. So when i go to move. I put both my hands on the arm rests and lift up. tighten your core and hold that position for about 30 seconds and then slowly lower myself down.Repeat this 3-5 times.

Chair Push-ups:
From the same cross legged sitting position, I do push-ups. I put my hands on the arm rests and lift myself up and lower myself back to the chair. Do this 10 times, rest for about 30 seconds and then repeat. Do this about 3-5 times.

Counter Dips:

If you have a file cabinet, counter, or even the edge of your desk works. I use my file cabinet (freaks out co-workers when they walk by and catch a glace of me). Sit on the cabinet and put your hands on either side of you, fingers out, holding the edge. Extend your legs out and bring your butt off the cabinet. Slowly dip down till your elbows are even with your shoulders and then push back up. Do this 10 times, rest for about 30 seconds and then repeat. Do this about 3-5 times.

Squats:
You can do these anywhere and your office is no exception. Sand up and lower into a squat position, betting your butt as low to the grown as possible while keeping your back straight. Do this 10 times, rest for about 30 seconds and then repeat. Do this about 3-5 times.

Seated Reverse Crunches:
Go to the edge of your chair, put your hands on the armrests and push yourself off. Squeeze your knees together and bring them in towards your chest and hold for a breath and then slowly lower your legs back down. Do this 5 times, rest for about 30 seconds and then repeat. Do this about 3-5 times.

Lunges:
This may not be something that you can do in your office, but if you have 1 min and can close the door this is a great one to add in. Even if you do it quickly in the supply closet or something. bend one leg placing the knee directly over the ankle and move the other leg back, go down bending and extending your front bent knee lunging forward. Do about 30 seconds on each side (or 30 lunges on each side)

As you do these little exercises more and more, you will get stronger and can add on or extend the time. But just because you can't be at the gym or training, doesn't mean being trapped in an office all days is a reason to not get a little quick workout in.  Remember working out is the best way to stay healthy and extend your life :)

Handywoman I am Not

Nothing like sitting watching TV in your living room when the overhead light suddenly goes out. 

Saved by the light glow from the TV, I carefully navigate to the closet to retrieve a new light bulb. Carrying the step-stool in one hand, light bulb in the other & a screwdriver in my mouth, I am proud to report that I only step on 2 dog  bones on my way back. 

I put the stool down, put on the kitchen light, fat lotta good that did as it only illuminates the kitchen sending no light around the corner to the living room where I am trapped in darkness. 

Realizing that this is going to be a blind mission, I head up the stool. I unscrew the glass dome around the light...change it, feeling much like a handywoman only to be rewarded with continuous darkness. 

Back and forth I go, light bulb, switch, switch, light bulb, am I missing something...5 min pass light, switch, switch, light....Check the fuse box...they all seem to be switched on. try a new light bulb, switch, light bulb, switch, new light bulb switch, fuse box again, switch again,...fuck, it's gadda be the wiring in the overhead ceiling fan. I believe I will need a new one. 

Fuck it, after the AC ordeal this week, I'm beyond stressed & tired & drained!!! I'm pouring a glass of wine & watching family guy in the dark! Screw it, I will just get a new bloody fan when the weekend (and payday) rolls around.

Off to work the next day, I leave my roommate with a note saying that something is wrong with the ceiling fan and I will get a new one this weekend. I spend the entire day venting about how frustrated I am that the stupid light when out and how I not only changed the light bulb and it didn't work, but I tried an entire box of light bulbs...so logical conclusion...it is the fan. 

I look on Lowe's and The Home Depot, getting prices for fans and budgeting out how much I have left after my AC leaked all over the place and I had to get someone in to do apparently what should be done yearly. Not much left in the bank, but I can't spend the next month in darkness ever time I am home. 

So Friday night finally rolls around and I plan to go tomorrow after training to The Home Depot, I figured out what one I was going to get and it was on sale and I was just going to bite the bullet and do without the luxury of extra food for the next week. 

A few friends come over for a Friday night nightcap and I am still on and on about this bloody ceiling fan and how frustrated I am at the whole situation, in between laughs one of my friends says, well did you try switching the fuse off and then on again.

Stunned that this is really an option obviously I had not. My friend goes to the fuse box, turns the switch off and then back on again and miraculously the light shines bright! Seriously, did I just sit in the dark for pretty much a week because of this. DEAR GOD, sometimes I swear I am a blond trapped in a brunettes body! How did no one think to suggest this to me before? 

Sometimes I wonder how I manage to even get dressed in the morning. So after this week, I realized Handywoman I am not...but I kinda already knew that one.  

How Young Do You Like Them??

So I'm at Dick's a week or so ago, picking up a "rash guard" and a guy browsing the shirts near me strikes up a conversation by asking if I'm shopping for my boyfriend. 

Smooth buddy...smooth. 

Being oblivious & kinda in a rush...training starts in 30 min. I tell him no, it's for me. He kinda follows me around, not super stalker like or anything, just chatting. Asking, what the shirt is for? How often do I workout? Where do I workout at? Just normal questions. 

I answer, he looks in his mid-30s, kinda fit & not that bad looking. But once I find what I need, I say bye and head to the checkout line. 

He follows me up.

"Sorry, I didn't get your name", he says 

"It's Chloe"

"How old are you Chloe?"

"30"

"Damn?! Really? I though you were younger"

Feeling flattered cuz every girl likes to be told they look younger then they are, I laugh & smile. 

"You're kinda old" he follows with.

I look at him. Did I mis-judge his age. Dude has to be in his 30s. He was kinda chatting me up 10 seconds ago. Did I miss something? 

"Why how old are you?" I ask

"35"

OK. Unsure of how to respond, I apologize, yes, seriously, I apologized & walked up to the register. I saw him again walking to my car, he didn't even look my way. 

Went from being hit on to being told I was to old in T Minus 5 seconds. 

WOW. Must say, that's a first for me. Guess he likes them young & ripe. 

Haha, being single never stops being interesting. 

The Resume Man

Dating in South Florida is hard and frustrating and sometimes...well most of the time these days, I am beginning to wonder if it is even worth it.

I meet guys in different places, out when I am on a run, at a race, at the dog park, etc....

Well about two months back I meet this guy at the park. I was running with my dog and we got to chatting when I stopped for water. He seemed normal enough and we chatted for a while. But it was getting hot and although the guy asked me if I wanted to go grab a coffee and keep talking, I wanted to:

A) Get home and give Jake something to eat, water and get him into the AC
B) Get a shower...I am dripping in sweat, its South Florida summer fools...sweat is running down my ass crack
C) What if he is crazy...do I really want to go have coffee with a crazy dude...need to weed out the crazy first

So I say no and I figure the best way to see if anything might spark is to give him my number. I tell him to text me sometime. I figure, we meet at a park so he has to be kinda into active things and maybe we have some stuff in common.

Well before I even get out of the park...guy is texting me. This may seem cute to some girls, but to me...we just spoke. I said text me sometime, not as soon as I drive away. --> FLAG 1

Whatever, I get home and showered, did what I needed to do and by the time I did respond (about 2 hours later), I had 4 or 5  more additional txt from him. He asked me what took so long, and told me that he was wondering what was going on. --> FLAG 2

Over the next week or so we text back and forth. As we get to talking I find out the so-called job he was telling me about was his OLD job and he is currently unemployed and has been for awhile now. OK, not the best, but I understand that the economy is in the crapper and jobs are sometimes hard to come by...but still. --> FLAG 3

Now the more he texts me the more I start to realize that running into him at the park was a fluke and that it was probably the first time he had even been to a park in years. He was there with some friend for a bbq or something. Whatever, I am a pretty active person so obviously I want to date someone who is active as well. When he starts asking me why I go to the gym everyday and telling me the last time he went was over a year ago...I start to wonder...maybe this isn't a good fit. --> FLAG 4

Next he owns a purse dog. I know, I know. men can own small weak yappy purse dogs. Hell Jake's bark is so girly it is embarrassing but he is still a 40lb mutt who is strong a hell and tough as nails! Boy runs 7 miles with me and can drag me down the road no problem. So a man with a dog smaller than my shoe...for me personally it is a turn off. --> FLAG 5

By flag number 5 in as many days...I decide...NOPE, rather not bother going down this road, should just say something before it goes any father.

So I give him a heads up. I tell him...in a nicer way, that  I don't think we would be much of a match considering his favorite pass time is sitting on the couch watching Dorito's, not looking for a new job while watching TV and mine is hitting the gym for a few hours every day and racing on the weekends. He said he still wanted to take me out to dinner and that I should give him a chance. Whatever...his choice, I said my peace.

So anyway....I got really busy with training and didn't respond for about 2 days, when I suddenly got a text saying.

"Hey Chloe Foster how have you been? Nice Facebook Picture, You are as pretty as I remember."

What...ummm...WTF...

I never told him my last name...did he just seriously just looked me up on Facebook --> YES all my privacy setting are up and pretty much you can't see shit unless we are friends...and I only friend people I KNOW, but I think if you are going to stalk someone on facebook (and other social media) you shouldn't tell them about it when you don't really know them yet. Stalk in a sneaky way, don't blare that crap out there.

I told him it was a little creepy and it kinda wigged me out.

He said he wasn't creepy and to prove it to me he proceeded to TEXT me a complete copy of his Resume...

Really...now that just got even creepier. I have never had a guy send me a copy of his Resume to prove to me that he was not creepy. I have never had a guy offer to show me his resume...what the hell does a resume have to do with if you are a creepster or not!? Seriously! Whatever...maybe I am just a complete bitch.

I told him that I would rather we end it and not take things farther....I didn't think we were a match anyway. He asked if we could be friends, and me being the anti-social person that I am passed on that options as well.

He has proceeded to text me at least 2 times a week since then...to this day. Just either with
"Hi" or "Are you still bothered by that" or "Can we be friends yet" or "How are you & Jake doing"

I never respond...don't need to lead him on...and it has been over 2 months.

Oh well, guess that wasn't romance in S. Florida...I am still on the "hunt" for a good many in this backasswards place. Maybe next time...but I I doubt it.

The 10th Annual Firefighter's 5K

This weekend, my girl and I did our 2nd race of the season, the Firefighters 5K.  After last weeks hill run and an insane week of training...I am sore...like SORE. I think my trainer is trying to kill me, but that is another blog for another time.

Usually when I go to races, I look like I just rolled out of bed...because I have. I roll out of bed, into cloths and off I go. However, my friend (who has her own make-up line) was practicing on me the day before and guys...I don't know if I can explain it to you, but she made me look so beautiful...I couldn't wash it all off. I left it on. LOL :) So I rolled up to the race looking like one sexy chick and then I proceed to CRUSH the race! LOL.

The run went along Hollywood beach, up into the neighborhoods and back around. I have run it a few times before (doing the whole boardwalk and neighborhoods not just part just on Sunday lazy days. ) and it really is a great run. But this time there was something different.

As we turn off the main boardwalk and head back into the neighborhoods, the trees start to in close in around us and suddenly you hear cats howling and fighting in the distance. The road shadows over and the sun disappears. "Ahhh, it will be nice and cool for a while" I  think to myself, but something strange is in the trees.  Everyone in front of me is looking up, so being the sheep when I run that I am look up as well and I feel the blood drain from my face and fall like lead into my feet. I start screaming at myself in my head...."Dear Mother of F'en God Run...Just RUN!!! As Fast as You Bloody Can".

Hundreds of what I now know are Banana Spiders had set up shop at the tops of the trees, stretching their webs from one side of the road to the other creating a canopy of GIANT SPIDERS!

no I hate spiders, like ice on my soul, death comes to quickly as they plot to weave me into a giant cocoon and feed me to their zillions of children...and above me was Satan's hell for me on earth.

My mind is screaming "GO FASTER You Dumb Bitch! FASTER, before they lasso you up to the canopy with their steel webs!"
My body is screaming "I CAN'T any Faster!? I think Her heart stopped...pretty sure she is in Shock! And the Dumb Bitches Feet kidnapped all the blood and they ain't giving it back!"
My feet are responding to the rest of my body with "You bitch now, but when one of those demon spiders spots us and tries to take us up into its web of death, you will be happy we have become lead weights!"

And then there is me...slowly turning around as I run forwards to where I am actually running backwards (going the right direction still, but my entire body is facing the other way and I am starring up into the sky screaming like a mad woman inside my head....coming up with ever different outcome of my death by giant spider.

Finally I circle back and start heading back out towards the boardwalk, I remain vigilant, waiting for the spiders to start attacking my fellow runners. I think to myself...must conserve my energy, because if they start warfear on us by dropping down on our heads. I must be ready. Looking around I spot 2 weaker looking woman a few feet behind me. I slow down so they can catch up, make no mistake folks, I will toss both them chicks to the spiders as a distracting while I try to get away.

However, no such sacrifice is needed as I hit the boardwalk. I realize that I have been holding my breath for most likely the entire time (locally really considering I didn't want to draw the evil spiders attention to me). I breath deep and start to sprint again....leaving the ally of pure venom behind me.

Now I focus back on the race...Shit...did I slow down to much and screw up my time. I hope now. I barrel towards the finish line. Both of the sacrificial lambs are still on my tail...time to lose them. I pick it up and give it that extra burst of energy I was saving in case a quick escape was needed from the Giant Spider attack and I finish strong. Breathing heavy for a change :)

Not only did I survive the Spider Apocalypse, but I managed to place and for the first time ever, I got a trophy! Not just a medal. I came in 2nd with a time of 23:17. Not my best time ever, but better than last week and not a bad time either way. And lets not forget...I was looking SEXY!

This was my 17 race of the year and one closer to my goal of 24!

The next race we are doing is the Miami Children's Hospital 5K. It will be one of our last races in Miami (basically anything farther than Amelia Park), getting up and driving the 35-45 min down there for a 23 min race isn't worth it. We have enough closer to home. So after a little discussing...if we haven't already signed up for it, we won't be doing it. Miami is just to far.  I know I have the ING and the Miami Beach, but beyond that...I think this will be the last 5K.