The Fall of Facebook

I remember when Facebook came out, I was already on MySpace (oh yes MySpace), I was in college and social media was just amazing!! So new, awesome posts, awesome updates, a great place to express yourself,  people would post the funniest things and I would check it constantly....

As I got older my step mum joined...and my aunts and uncles...and then my grandparents and they all wanted to friend me. Dear GOD we are family, isn't that enough. But you can't ignore them forever, they would ask "why haven't you accepted my friend request yet" and I realized...ummm this may not be the place I want to go to post things about my personal life anymore.

I did eventually friend them and put them ALL into a restricted group, along with my co-workers and the random people that I would run into a few times at the bar and become acquaintances with. I block them from pretty much everything, and for a while Facebook went back to being a fun way to keep up with my friends.

And then companies wanted to know your social media profiles and they began to use it as a way to dig into your personal life and cross over that line between work and personal. Thankfully my privacy walls were already up full force thanks to the family invasion that had happened earlier

A few more year pass and Facebook, and probably myself and my friends become lame (they get married, have kids, no more wild parts and hilarious weekend extravaganza posts) and I slow began to lose interest.  

Now I get on Facebook about once a day, just in the hopes that someone posted something good. I scroll down the news feed for about 3 minutes while I take my morning crap and then I am done for the day....at least with my personal page. 

 Lucky me, I get to go to work and handle the social media for my job, which is kinda cool...considering how much Facebook (and so many other social media sites) have either given up, fallen victim or just sold out the the business world. 

 Sadly, No one posts anything relevant...just pictures of their pathetic kids (and lets get real people, no one cares about your kids...only you and your parents) or re-posts from other pages, and not other peoples pages, but other promotional pages, news pages, celebrity pages, fitness pages, TV show pages, etc. Lets be real, We ALL hate those re-posts of other sites. It seems that is all people do all the time. Every time I see one I just think to myself. If I wanted to see that shit, I would follow that page...come up with something original or don't post at all. And then I log out of Facebook and onto something else. 

Sadly, this isn't Facebooks fault. it is the people on Facebook. They actually think that you are going to like something and NOT already be following it and it suddenly becomes their obligation to shove it down your throat! WHAT JOY!

So that is how I have seen Facebook fall since I joined way, way, way back in College.

Jingle Bell 5K Jog 2013

I have the best running partner in the world who helps me train for all my races & encourages me to run every day no matter how I feel, even if it's just for a mile or two...my dog.

So for the last race of 2013, and since I missed the doggy 5K in April, I figured there was no better way to end the year then doing a run with my best friend & my mum to cheer us on. 

I must admit that my mum & I were a little hung over from our per-holiday lychee matinee night :-) but Jake was ready to go enough for all of us. 

I was so proud of my little man, he was focused & set off. We were doing really well, good pace (he was basically dragging my hungover ass)...until he got the call of the wild. Maybe he knew we were in a race or maybe it was a tactical move to hinder the eny behind us, but my man decided to take a dump...in the middle of the road. But instead of just doing one. He tried to keep running, leaving small, let's call them land mines, across the road.

Nice work partner, that will slow them down. 

After that he must have gotten his second wind, because he picked it up. 

I can't quite explain the look of anger & frustration on peoples face as my happy go lucky dog goes bounding past them without a second thought. 

My boy kicked ass and we managed to still pull into 5th place in my age group. And the sad thing, that boy was ready for round 2 in no time. 

This race brought me to a whooping total of 22, just shy of my goal of 24.

The Lane Change Game

So I have decided. Although the un-uses of a blinker irritates me. I have come to the conclusion that it is in fact a tactical movement to not use them.

In South Florida (and I am sure many other places) when signaling you are going to get over a lane does not actually make it easier for you to change lanes.

Instead it alerts the person in the lane that you are attempting to get into & in front of about your plan. Which just causes them to speed up to ensure you cannot get over leaving you trapped in your current lane.

So see, if you hadn't told them of your plan, you would be happily in your lane instead of passing your exit & getting pissed. Just saying...it's all about aggressive tactical driving abs not being just being a dick driver.

Morning Radio "News"??

On my morning commute, I normal listen to npr, but this morning I was feeling a little drowsy, so when they started talking about research on sleep patterns I though maybe I would change the station, listen to some music, wake myself up. Switching over to The Beat (a local hip hop station) I land on a segment about celebrity rumors. Not my thing, but I figured it wouldn't make me spend my ride to work thinking about my bed & sleeping.

It spent time telling me how Khloe & Lamar had split up and how Khloe had moved on to a baseball played.

OK, not sure how this information is relevant to me in anyway...heck all I wanted was some upbeat music to wake me up during my morning commute...

Then suddenly I hear them saying how Khloe is a smart hoe & it's a new trend for hoe's to get smart & hook up w/ baseball players because they have guaranteed contracts (aka lots of money), and some woman (I don't know who) was smart for getting knocked up by a baseball player & getting him on lock down or whatever. I learnt that women are now all gold diggers, they just date these men for their money & apparently women should be proud of that fact....oh wait, sorry, us hoes should be proud & those hoes not in that position should aspire to be. 

What the hell am I listening to?!!!? Really...so in the less then five min I was on this station, women were referred to as hoe's. Any woman dating an athlete is a hoe. Basically I'm getting all women are hoes. Getting knocked up by a baseball player is smarter then any other athlete...and I just can't say how many things were wrong w/ that short segment I just listened to. 

I switched back to NPR. Listening to research on a sleep study beats the hell outta listening to a generalization about women = hoes & gold diggers. 

And I'm glad I did, the sleep segment was very interesting. 

Weston Half Marathon - AKA The Run of Death

I should have known better that after coming back from the blinding cold of England to the warm perfection on South Florida I would get sick...but with my normal voracity, I though I was invincible, until I fell victim to the full, just in time for my Half Marathon...AKA...The Run of Death!

Now doing a 5K feeling a little stuffy, but doing a Half Marathon (13.1 grueling miles) with a full blown flu with nauseous, fever, dizziness the works is beyond a lot worse.

From the time I got home Friday night until the time I woke up for the race Sunday morning, I left my bed for food and bathroom...nothing more. Saturday night I felt so horrible that I spent have the night curled up on the bathroom flood debating if I was going to even live to see the morning.

When my alarm finally went off Sunday I wanted to die, but I dragged my sorry ass outta bed and to the race. I down a few more then the suggested daily intake of some Tylenol cold and flu (the good stuff from behind the counter, not that cheap imitation stuff they try to pawn off on you from shelf), told myself it was only 2 hours....then I could go back to bed and die. Plus, I didn't die last night so I was good right...WRONG!

I meet up with my friend at the race & I know I will go faster then her (if only by a little), so if all else fails she will see me dead on the road and be able to alert my loved ones.

The race starts and the meds have kicked in by this time so I am actually off to a good start. 8:39 min miles...not to shabby I tell myself, I am not dying after all...I can do this right...but 8:39 min miles turns into 9:36 min miles and by mile 8 I have convinced myself that gods themselves are going to come down off Olympus and mock me as I fall dehydrated and dry-heaving to the ground to be trampled under the feet of real runners and walkers who are now passing me as I jog pathetically along at 10:36 min miles.

How much worse can it get I tell myself. The sun is beating down on my deprecated body and I struggle with each breath as the dry heat sucks the air from me. Sure death is standing just up ahead ready to cut my down with his scythe, I struggle on.

**After the race, I find out that the conditions were some of the worse for a race and the humidity etc had taken many races down**

Convinced I have passed the point of no return into delirium I begin to notice others around me. We pass a Firehouse and a very fit couple turn off the course and run up to the station flagging down one of the firefighters. I see more than normal police on bikes riding by and many times with people on the back of them. Convinced I am hallucinating I lean again a pole trying to get the world to stop spinning. I know my body just wants to rest, but having just passed mile 11, how can I give up now.

A police officer scares me half to death and awakes me from what I believe may have been me falling into death asks me if I am OK. Sucking it up, I tell him I was just catching my breath and I push myself back up right...as I seemed to have slid down the pole slightly and set off again...at what I have decided we will call a fast walk....2 more miles until I can collapse.

Just 2 more miles...and dear god where they the longest 2 miles of my running life!

Mile 12 - 11:43 min and Mile 13 - 12:13 min

If it hadn't been for this guy running along next to me, I may have just crawled to the finish line. But he ran up next to me and ran with me for the last 1.5 miles...well more like speed walked, but at this point in time, I am not going to pick and choose what I call it. In my mind at that moment I was just pleased to be moving.

Crossing that finish line was the biggest accomplishment ever. I think I had sweat out every last bit of flu. I drank 4 bottles of water and pretty sure I pushed a little kid out of the way to get more.

That was truly The Run of Death! But I overcome it and defeated it! :) Take that B!Tche$!!!

Tonbridge U.K. 5K - AKA The Run of the Ice Age

While on vacation in the UK (attending the Doctor Who 50th Celebration & visiting family), I decided it would be fun to sign up & do a 5K. You know, different weather, different terrain, why not, I can't do all my running on Florida flats forever. Hell our idea of a hill is over a bridge!!

So after some looking around I came across this site, ParkRun.org. They offer weekly FREE 5Ks all over Great Britain! 

*Can I just say, why the hell don't we offer that in the US? Free weekly runs would be awesome!*

I find a local one near my Uncle, I send him a quick email to make sure he'd be available to take me and I sign up...ready for my first run outside the U.S.

We land in England & for a girl who has spent the last 5 years in Florida where it doesn't get below 50 year round I almost died walking off that plane! Now I have lived in upstate NY, the Mountains of VA & the wasteland of STL MO, but being in S. FL has spoiled me!! I remembered in theory what cold was, but my body had forgotten! 

I did try to run almost every day of my trip. I even managed to get a 2 mile run done in the middle of London (Kings Cross) which I'm sure caused a few people to look. But once we got to my families (Burgess Hill) I found a nice 5 like route that even passed by a park so I could do push ups, jumping jacks, Burpees, squats etc. being on vacation is no reason to get lazy.

So race day finally rolled around I was pretty sure I was ready to do this. I didn't expect a PR, but I was confident I would do OK. I'd talked my cousin Kim into doing it with me. One of the real nice things...the race started at 9:30 am, so no 5 am wake up call. But it was cold & wet & muddy!!! And I was decked out in a long sleeve rash guard and long runner compression pants (Skins - love them) and everyone around me was in shorts and shirts. Were they mad? Was I mad? What was going on here, because it was cold...like COLD! I wasn't a complete mad hatter as my cousin also had cold weather running apparel on, but dear god these other people, completely loons if you ask me!

The race started off fine. Only a 5K quick and dirty full on run it out race, but about a mile in this Florida girl started to feel it.

First my noes & fingers went. No worries, you don't need that to run. 

Then my toes stated to numb and the little voice inside my head asking why I was running in sub zero temperatures started to get louder and louder until she was SCREAMING BLOODY MURDER AT ME. By the time I hit the turn to circle back every breath I took racked the back of my throat & in pure agony. I was terrified to spit encase I'd see blood! Yes that's right, I'd convinced myself that the cold air had ripped apart my insides & I swore I could taste the blood trickling down my throat into my esophagus and down to my tummy.

But that wasn't the worst. Besides being 85% sure at least one toe had fallen off  if not two, I could no longer feel my legs. At any moment I was going to topple forward, over roll over, & see my legs burying themselves under some dead leaves for warmth. I kept checking to not only make sure they were still there but also still moving & not just bricks of ice.

WELL YOU BETTER PICK IT UP NOW YOU MORON the voice inside my head kept screaming at me and all I could do was respond with, "I can't pick it up, I only have 9 toes and am losing blood at what I am sure is a very disturbing rate inside my mouth!"

Pushing myself forward I knew I was almost there, and crossing the finish line I wanted to just keep running to a car...with the heat on full blast...and just sit in it, never to emerge again!

But I did well, I actually managed to come in 2nd Female and 1st in my age group. No prizes or medals or anything, but the fact that when I did take off my shoes and check I had all 10 toes was prize enough.

I love the fact that I did a race outside the U.S. and I hope to do many more all over the world, but I will have to remember that not everywhere has weather like we do in South Florida! 

Classic Chloé Moments - Me v/s TV

I seem spend my life on the go go go. I never seem to stop moving, so last night when I finally had a plan free evening to relax w/ Jakearoni & my TV I was stocked! 

Saturday had been a long day for me already, I was up at 6 am for the Fight for Air 5K (which I crushed btw) then it was off to work. Did a little BJJ training, then taught kickboxing, Dim Sum w/ my friend...let's just say I needed a "do nothing" evening.

I got a bottle of mid-grade Pinot Noir (I'm a broke girl), cooked up a delicious chicken dinner & sank into my couch of lost hope. I flipped on the TV & started catching up on my way too full DVR, shows going back 2-3 weeks, it was gonna be a good night. 

But you know me, I can't sit still for too long before the box of Halloween decorations that I pulled out of the closet earlier was starting to stare at me. So after failing to ignore it, I got up and figured I would just set up a few of the decoration around the house...get the season started. 

After about an hour...somehow the decorations led to sweeping and moping the floor, dusting everything in sight and of course cleaning up all the dishes, I was feeling done & grabbed my now second glass of wine and sat back down. 

Suddenly my AT&T remote wasn't working. 

WTF!? Did I somehow un-program it while in my cleaning frenzy? OK, no problem...I go to the remote setup. Manual..input all the codes...volume still not working. Odd. I try the automatic remote setup...volume still not working. Curious. I tried all the codes again...volume still not working. Bizzar. I look at the remote...it's an S4, set up says it is for a S1 thur S3 series, so I Google it...maybe I'm missing something. Nope, S4 series is also like S1-S3. So I try the automatic set up again. Nada. Seriously. I try the codes yet a-fucking-gain...volume still not working. 

By this time, I'm starting to get pissed. Are the batteries dying? Is this new remote ATT sent 2 weeks ago already jacked up (my last one finally died and I had to replace it)? Is my TV evil? Does God hate me!!!???

So I change the batteries...nothing. 
Starting to convince myself that I am just missing something obvious, I grab the TV remote...& this is where things get twisted...the TV remote is also not working. What The Hell Is Going On!!!??? I never use the TV remote...batteries are fresh in BOTH remotes. Yup I am going mad.

Well my night has gone from relaxing to frustrating. I can still stop, pause, fast forward, view recordings, turn the TV on & off...screw it. My second glass of wine quickly turns into a third as I get more and more obsessed with this freaking remote. I can't relax, it is just driving me crazy, why is the volume not working. I worked an hour ago. 

Knowing that I am working myself towards a psychotic break, I force myself to give up. I don't know, maybe it will randomly start working again tomorrow. I find the volume on the actual TV, adjust it & after an HOUR AND HALF of messing with it. I just watch TV. By now it's 10:30 & I'm falling asleep on the couch so I sleep walk myself to bed. Plus, I can't stop thinking about the dame remote!

This morning after my run I sit on the couch to enjoy my tea & watch some news before heading to the gym. 

The volume is STILL NOT WORKING. As I quickly dust around my TV (yes, I like things clean..so what) something hits me...I put a Halloween decoration right in front if the center of the TV. A foam zombie zone sign...could that be blocking the censor? 

Test...yup..facepalm. IDIOT! 

Classic Chloe!